Don't take it away.

I am happy, and I don't ask for anything else other than letting me be. 

Don't ruin this.

And to you, thank you for being the reason behind my smile and the cause of my happiness :)

If you can't understand me, understand this :)

Seoul Garden

Seoul Garden courtesy of Naqiuddin Md Shah for our class dinner. I love my friends, they've been for me through the hardest times. This is my 6th semester, and though I am ecstatic to leave Melaka, I don't think I ever wanna lose them. Diploma in Photography and Creative Imaging batch 2009-2012

You know this is about you.

Because unfortunately, this is something so true about you. You can't just expect me to forgive you and believe that after 3 long months of disappearance, you feel remorse over breaking my heart? You had your chance, yet you walked away to another girl. Then again, second chances would not be needed if you did things right in the first place, in your case however, plenty.

You say things as if it is as simple as you make it sound to be. Use the 'handyplas' to mend my heart? Kinder Bueno chocolate as an act of sweetness and sincerity because apparently its my favourite? You must be blind and stupid to think I was the girl who fell in love with you over these little things. I was seventeen, of course I was stupid to love you. Yes, we had our ups and downs and somehow those times in the past we did manage to overcome it. But, I had managed to overcome your lies and cheats and other bull-fucking-shits one too many times. At that point, I could no longer bear it. I don't even know who I was in love with. Now, it's gonna take you more than text messages and kinder bueno chocolate with attached notes on it to prove your remorse and sincerity. Because frankly, you're no longer worth trusting.

You lied so many times, yet I looked way pass beyond that because I still care about you. You cheated on me so many times, yet I looked way pass beyond that too because I denied the truth. I denied the fact that you were no longer the person I love, and trust. You were just a stranger, physically attached to the person I never wanted to lose.

I was dumb to actually believe the things you say, and I would be even dumber to believe you now. How dare you ask me if I was still mad? For crying out loud, you broke my fucking heart, you heartless scumbag. I am furious to the point that I'd never wanna see you again. I still don't wanna see you though, just so we're clear.

You know, the way I see it, the only reason you are trying to apologize to me again is because all your futsal buddies are slow socially. After your tournament, everyone is back to their own businesses and you are left with no one to entertain you. I gladly ask you now, where the fuck is your Ija, your Izzah and everyone else now? Are they not with you, that you had to come crawling and beg for my forgiveness? You are pathetic. You gotta earn my forgiveness and that's gonna take you more than you can afford.

Before, yes. I would forgive you, but not anymore. I am not some toy you could play around and when your friends are back again, you'd throw me away again, just like you did so many times before. I am a person with feelings, I am not heartless like you. Because the last time you did this to me, its no longer a mistake, its a choice you made. You choose her, over me.

Its funny how I never wanted to say goodbye to you because I loved you all too much. Maybe, its because I don't love you anymore that I don't care. I'd rather lose you than risk my happiness again, I'd lose you if it means I can be happy again. I don't care apparently, I don't care about you anymore.

I trust you have so many other people in your life, you can get so many other girls. But, you can never have me again. You had me once, and you are 3 months over due. Thank you so much for teaching me the ways of life. You made me stronger, wiser and more independent.


p/s: Here's another secret : I had previously written down a note for you as a closure for myself but never managed to send it to you. That one was much more kinder than this, but I guess I was wrong about the last note. This is the real one, because now I know how I feel. End of story :)
xoxo.

Result for Semester 05

People have been bugging me about my results and how I did this semester. I was in no obligation to tell them and show off but looking at it, this is nothing to be ashamed of. My commitment and effort reflected my grades just fine the past semesters before and I never questioned any of the decisions my lecturers decisions about things. I am just grateful I never had to repeat any paper, or re-sit for unnecessary exams.

I know there are people who has better grades than me, how they achieved deans list for 5 consecutive semesters, but I am proud of myself and for that, and to keep everyone shut, here is what I am willing to show you. just this.

And for the past for semesters, my grades have gone up from 3.2 to 3.32 to 3.4 to 3.4 again and finally to this. Syukur alhamdulillah, this is our chance to go on stage and take picture with the campus director. My friends and I. I am proud of everyone in my class.

xoxo Jaja Je Lah

Hello.

It finally paid off, the 5 days a week of 8am-6pm work, the document archiving, the file packing, the box-making - everything finally paid off. Here I am, a month later with yet another achievement. I finally got my hands on the one I have been determined to own, the one I have been saving every penny of every day, the one I am proud to show people because apparently I paid this one with every cent of my own penny, to the very last dime.

The Blackberry Torch 2

I know there are many of you who disagree with my choice of phone but really, I have friends and family who uses Torch 1 and until now I have yet to hear them complain about their gadgets. The trick to having one of these beauty is to actually take care of them with love and care (aicey poyo).

Though at first I came across a difficult path of decision when I was at the store. I found out that blackberry has another new (and not really famous) model called the Blackberry 9860 and it cost a lot cheaper than the torch 2. 

Its a full touch screen phone by Blackberry. Its sleek and its sophisticated but its just not what I wanted. If I wanted to buy a full touch screen phone, why not buy an iPhone? Clearly the price doesn't range that much but well, I am not much of an apple fan. Steve Jobs made an amazing change to the world of technologies, don't get me wrong. I'm just not a big fan of his product. That's all. People have their own wants.

Well, here's the  full description of both the blackberry I posted above :

Blackberry Torch 2

GENERAL	2G Network	GSM 850 / 900 / 1800 / 1900
	3G Network	HSDPA 850 / 1900 / 2100
	Announced	2011, August
	Status	Available. Released 2011, August

SIZE	Dimensions	111 x 62 x 14.6 mm
	Weight	161 g

DISPLAY	Type	TFT capacitive touchscreen, 16M colors
	Size	480 x 640 pixels, 3.2 inches (~250 ppi pixel density)
		- QWERTY keyboard - Optical trackpad - Multi-touch input method - Proximity sensor for auto turn-off

SOUND	Alert types	Vibration, MP3 ringtones
	Loudspeaker	Yes
	3.5mm jack	Yes

MEMORY	Phonebook	Practically unlimited entries and fields, Photocall
	Call records	Yes
	Internal	8 GB storage, 768 MB RAM
	Card slot	microSD, up to 32GB, buy memory

DATA	GPRS	Yes
	EDGE	Yes
	3G	HSDPA 14.4Mbps, HSUPA
	WLAN	Wi-Fi 802.11 b/g/n, UMA (carrier-dependent)
	Bluetooth	Yes, v2.1 with A2DP
	Infrared port	No
	USB	Yes, microUSB v2.0

CAMERA	Primary	5 MP, 2592х1944 pixels, autofocus, LED flash, check quality
	Features	Geo-tagging, continuous auto-focus, face detection, image stabilization
	Video	Yes, 720p, check quality
	Secondary	No

FEATURES	OS	BlackBerry OS 7.0
	CPU	1.2 GHz processor
	Messaging	SMS, MMS, Email, Push Email, IM
	Browser	HTML
	Radio	No
	Games	Yes + downloadable
	Colors	Black, Gray
	GPS	Yes, with A-GPS support
	Java	Yes, MIDP 2.0
		- Digital compass - Document viewer (Word, Excel, PowerPoint) - MP3/WMA/WAV/eAAC+ player - DivX/XviD/MP4/WMV/H.263/H.264 player - Organizer - Voice memo/dial - Predictive text input

BATTERY		Standard battery, Li-Ion 1270 mAh
	Stand-by	Up to 308 h (2G) / Up to 300 h (3G)
	Talk time	Up to 6 h 30 min (2G) / Up to 5 h 50 min (3G)
	Music play	Up to 54 h

Blackberry 9860

GENERAL	2G Network	GSM 850 / 900 / 1800 / 1900
	3G Network	HSDPA 900 / 1700 / 2100
		HSDPA 850 / 1900 / 2100 / 800
	Announced	2011, August
	Status	Available. Released 2011, September

SIZE	Dimensions	120 x 62 x 11.5 mm
	Weight	135 g

DISPLAY	Type	TFT capacitive touchscreen, 16M colors
	Size	480 x 800 pixels, 3.7 inches (~252 ppi pixel density)
		- Optical trackpad - Multi-touch input method - Proximity sensor for auto turn-off - Accelerometer sensor for auto-rotate

SOUND	Alert types	Vibration, MP3 ringtones
	Loudspeaker	Yes
	3.5mm jack	Yes

MEMORY	Phonebook	Practically unlimited entries and fields, Photocall
	Call records	Yes
	Internal	2.5 GB storage, 768 MB RAM
	Card slot	microSD, up to 32GB, buy memory

DATA	GPRS	Yes
	EDGE	Yes
	3G	HSDPA 14.4 Mbps, HSUPA 5.76 Mbps
	WLAN	Wi-Fi 802.11 b/g/n
	Bluetooth	Yes, v2.1 with A2DP
	Infrared port	No
	USB	Yes, microUSB v2.0

CAMERA	Primary	5 MP, 2592х1944 pixels, autofocus, check quality
	Features	Geo-tagging, continuous auto-focus, image stabilization, face detection
	Video	Yes, 720p, check quality
	Secondary

FEATURES	OS	BlackBerry OS 7
	CPU	1.2 GHz processor
	Messaging	SMS, MMS, Email, Push Email, IM, BBM 6
	Browser	HTML
	Games	Yes + downloadable
	Colors	Black
	GPS	Yes, with A-GPS support
	Java	Yes, MIDP 2.1
		- Digital compass - Social feeds - BlackBerry maps - Document viewer (Word, Excel, PowerPoint) - Media player MP3/WMA/eAAC+/FlAC/OGG player - Video player DivX/XviD/MP4/WMV/H.263/H.264 - Organizer - Voice memo/dial

BATTERY		Standard battery, Li-Ion 1230 mAh
	Stand-by	Up to 330 h (2G) / Up to 320 h (3G)
	Talk time	Up to 4 h 40 min (2G) / Up to 6 h 50 min (3G)
	Music play	Up to 44 h

xoxo Jaja Je Lah